UAL 19: Attitude of Self: Charles Style
I come to the reader once again to convey yet another concept not very much accepted by the masses, and that would be on the attitude in which we perceive ourselves. To start off, I would just like to use myself as an example of this. I am very fond of myself; I absolutely love and adore myself. I feel that I am the most important person in the world and that I am the very center of the universe. I like to take care of myself well and always seek to better myself. To me, I am the %$@% (to put it bluntly). Now allow me to read your mind and tell you the way you most likely perceived this paragraph. You think that I am a completely delusional, self-centered, egoistic, narcissistic human being that has absolutely no grounds to say these thing, and if your in the minority that didn’t think this, well, this should come as review to you.
I shall start off by stating that being an animal, and more specifically a human being, means that we have a nervous system, of which we are fortunate enough to have brains. And these brains create the phenomena of the mind, of which we seem to forget this relationship. We intuitively think that there is a separation of mind and body, and thus we forget how our minds work. Every bit of sensory input that you get from your body is processed by your brain. This means that everything that you experience is in your brain/mind,thus our mind is a reconstruction of reality. Therefore, you are the center of your own reality, seeing as the universe is perceived by YOU. This is pretty obvious, but this justifies being self-centered. Everything that we are and experience is centered around us, so why not act and think in this way? This doesn’t mean that you neglect others and exploit them without a conscience, it’s just accepting that you are the center of your life. Plain and simple. There’s nothing wrong with it and it’s not “evil” or the like. (In fact, concepts of “evil” are quite silly, and more on that in a later entry) So yes, being self-centered is not immoral or wrong, simply natural.
Now then, seeing as we observe and experience reality in ourselves, we can start to appreciate ourselves. Humans seem to not love themselves as much as they should. We each have a fantastic amount of potential in ourselves, we just don’t seem to tap into it. Why? I blame a lack of self-esteem and self-love based upon insecurities and perception of control. People tend to have an external locus of control, which means that they believe that they themselves cannot change their circumstances and that all that they experience is a product of others’ manipulations. This is evident in those who believe that they cannot change the world because they are only an individual in a mass of billions. They lack an internal drive, something that causes them to be passive in life and have a low self-esteem. The fact of the matter is that all of us can change our own environments, because not only can we perceive all that is our reality, but we can influence that very same reality to our liking. An inward drive to change things or to be in control of their reality is what every great human in history has had. When we feel that we have the ability to influence the world, we find out that we actually CAN, and thus a boost in self-esteem occurs. This ability is great; it is amazing; it is ours. This is why we should be egoistic. We can boast of ourselves because we utilize this potential to self-actualize (to become one’s ideal self). So if you think that you have done things in your life that make you feel better about yourself and let yourself become the master of your own reality, then congratulations, you have bragging rights. This is the consequence of being egoistic.
Realization of potential —> Thought of ideal self —> Effort to actualize this self —> Self-actualization —> Renewal (continuing to a higher ideal self and maintaining past progress) —> Next stage self-actualization —> Etc.
The driving force: egoism.
Next, since you are the only guaranteed person to be with for your entire life, you should really get along with yourself well, so doesn’t it just make sense to love yourself? I personally don’t need this reasoning, for I know that I’m an amazing human being for all of my abilities, accomplishments and way of thinking, so I just love myself based upon that, and of course the same could be said for yourself. It’s a great motivator for growth, too. If I hate myself, I may not even wish to help myself, because who helps those whom they hate? Very few, and the opposite is true for love. Of all of the people on the planet, I love myself the most because I understand the magnitude of what I am and can see the subtle details surrounding my life that I’ve come to appreciate quite a lot. This same appreciation is the cause to care for one’s self and to make oneself grow into a creature more beautiful than once thought possible.
Now then, it’s time to address our culture’s perspective on this whole frame of thought. Negative connotations are given to the concepts of egoism, self-centralism and the like. Let’s face it people, we are humans too, and we should treat ourselves like any other human. Our society’s “morals” say that we should be kind, supportive, loving and giving to other humans. So why should we discriminate against ourselves? We’re humans too. Why should “I” be any different from “you”? Why should I give compliments to you, while being quiet about myself? Now if I were to give myself compliments and be kind to myself and refrain from telling you of the wonders of you, why is that different? Why is the former culturally acceptable, while the latter example is frowned upon? There exists the same human beings with the same actions, but different targets. This logic that our culture gives us is greatly flawed. We ARE amazing. The way things should be is that I give compliments to you and me, and you the same, because we both deserve recognition for our greatness from the both of us. You’re the %$@%, I’m the %$@%, and we both know it and exemplify it to its end.
There is a delusion here, and it’s not from this side; it’s from our culture. Our culture wants us to reinforce each other without reinforcing ourselves, which does not work. We must be reinforced within and without.
To conclude, I would just like to use myself as an example of these ideas. I am very fond of myself; I absolutely love and adore myself. I feel that I am the most important person in the world and that I am the very center of the universe. I like to take care of myself well and always seek to better myself. To me, I am the %$@%.
Remember, without me, I don’t exist, so in the reality perceived by myself, which is everything to me, I’m the most important person in the universe.
Charles Raymond Matusky